Good morrow ladies and gentlemen. Just a brief update, I have moved website, which clearly you know if you are reading this on the new site! No promises on regular content, I’ll basically update as and when the occasion strikes with the first update hopefully arriving tomorrow.
Why have I moved site?
-It’s a cleaner, more simplified design
-Tumblr is easier to facilitate adding audio files and other complicated things
-It is so much easier to edit and post new content
-It is a more recognisable format for many of you readers to enjoy
So, hopefully see you soon! The old content has all been moved over more or less, with date labels so you know exactly when it was written. I hope you all enjoy what you find here and here’s hoping to a fantastic future for us all.
Hello there, and welcome to a podcast of such you have never heard and never will hear again! The reason being as this is the only one!
Basically me and my friend Tim, (Off2timbuktooo on YouTube), decided to start recording podcasts for my blog, so he came round a couple of months back and we recorded this! Computer issues ensued and essentially meant that I had no access to the files for about 2 months hence why this is so outdated, sorry! However, we put a lot of work into it and I thought you guys should at least be able to have a listen.
The reason why this will be the one and only podcast in this series is that me and Tim are joining our good friends Ben and Ashley to start a new podcast series which I am delighted to announce here! It's called Ducks in Jam Jars Presents: The Jamcast, (or The Jamcast for short), and will be a fortnightly-ish podcast discussing videogames and funny things in life. So consider this podcast a trial or taster for what is to come when we start recording the Jamcast which should go live around the first week of June.
A lot has been said about online marketplaces in the videogames industry and whether they are good, bad, or somewhere in between. You can probably find various well written articles out there fighting on either side. I just happened to notice something the other day which prompted me to throw my virtual hat into the ring, (a Panama Hat if you were wondering).
I purchased Titanfall on PC a few days back and if I find the time, I will almost certainly be writing about it. However it was the way that I went about buying it, that caused me to think about the issue of online marketplaces. Initially, the Steam marketplace was my first port of call, everything is on Steam these days. Except, everything is not on Steam these days. For the most part, the publishers of Titanfall, EA, chooses to sell it's PC games through their own online marketplace, Origin. This makes business sense, Valve, (the company who run the Steam marketplace), take a cut of all sales made through Steam, whereas if a game is sold through Origin, all the profit stays with EA. It would be nice then, if EA passed some of the savings they're making through selling games on their own marketplace, to us, the consumer, however most new, triple-A games on Origin appear around the £40-50 mark, Titanfall for example on the date of writing is £45 for the standard edition. Yet, this is business, EA is a large company, wanting to make as much money from us as possible, to expect anything better is at best, hopeful, at worst, downright ignorant. The same goes for Valve, any company trying to sell a product has the aim of making money. So moving the issue of pricing aside, let's focus on the next topic. Presentation.
Upon opening Steam, you are taken to the 'Library' tab whereby all your games that you own are presented to you in a list, ready to play. Very user-friendly, very convenient, and gives the impression that despite what I just said, Valve aren't all about the money. Even if they are, it's nice to be deceived sometimes. However, when I opened Origin, wanting to find Titanfall, I found Titanfall straight away. Hurray! How convenient! It's as if EA were reading my mind! These were my first thoughts, and then I took a second to think about it. When I opened Origin, the first place I was taken to was the store-front. Advertisements for Titanfall and Battlefield 4 were blasted at my face. Admittedly, it doesn't take much to then click the 'My Games' tab where I'm presented with all of my games, but it still leaves a bitter after-taste of corporate money grabbing and burned toast in my mouth. Admittedly one of those things may have been my breakfast but EA is probably in some way at fault for my poor breakfast making skills too.
These were just some comparisons I noticed and thought would be interesting to write about, so before EA take notice and decide to shut my ass down, let's move on to the wider subject of online marketplaces. I decided against buying Titanfall through Origin and instead found a discounted copy for an Origin code on another website. But this got me asking, why is it that stores like Amazon were selling Titanfall for around the £30 mark, yet Origin, who are owned by the people publishing the game, couldn't match their prices? The same goes for a lot of online marketplaces owned by games publishers, for example Ubisoft's U-play often suffers the same pricing problem, as does the PlayStation's and Xbox's marketplaces. Surely if companies receive the most profit through selling their games on their own marketplaces they would entice customers through competitive pricing? It's common business sense, right?
Well, yes and no. The simple answer would be sure, price retailers out of the game so you can maximise profits on your sales. However this ignores one key fact. The majority of gamers still purchase either in-store or through online retailers such as Amazon, and whilst more and more people are purchasing through marketplaces such as Steam, retail still holds a lot of power. If a company such as EA priced them out of the market, retailers can simply threaten to no longer stock their games and then a massive chunk of their audience will no longer know where to buy their games, not to mention the advertising that physical stores provide for games. Next time you walk into your local games store, notice how many boards, videos and those big cardboard cut-out thingys there are, all advertising games at you. If a retailer stopped stocking a game, the advertising space would then open up for a rival company's game and that alone could significantly damage how well a game's release would do financially. Platform holders such as PlayStation and Xbox are in an even worse situation. They rely on retailers to sell their consoles. In the current situation, platform holders simply cannot risk losing retailers, for if they can't get their consoles into stores, people simply won't buy them.
So the more complicated, business-y and downright dull answer is that business practices and the hold retail has on the market means that currently, competitive pricing through online marketplaces isn't a realistic option, and that's a shame for us consumers. The only marketplace that seems to get away with this is Steam, the Steam sales are well renowned amongst gamers and you can often come away with some incredible deals there, (totally not sponsored by Steam at all). Steam has nothing to fear by offering this service as they very rarely make games in comparison to other similarly sized companies, so it's not often that they have to worry about how well their new games sell. Additionally, whilst the individual games publishers do control how much their games cost on Steam, as the Steam catalogue is so wide, and as the Steam sales are such a regular occurrence, publishers don't have to worry about standing out as directly competing as much as they would if making their game a lower, more competitive price in their own marketplace.
However, it is my belief that soon we will see a change. As evidenced by GAME and other game retailer's shaky financial positions, physical game retail is dying, or at the very least becoming harder to sustain. After games retail dies, I wouldn't be surprised if the only place to buy physical copies of games were supermarkets. That would be the time whereby online marketplaces could really fill in the gap left by games retail, and start to become truly competitive. Additionally, as PC gaming becomes more and more a viable option; with cheaper PC's becoming more available and with gaming on PC becoming less awkward to set up, awareness of online marketplaces will surely rise. The only place to buy many PC games, (especially indie titles), are online markteplaces, and so I predict at some point in the next 5-10 years, certainly before the next console generation, a large shift towards gamers only buying games digitally and leaving physical retail behind, whether it be on their console or PC. This is something that is beneficial to both games publishers and consumers as it creates more profit for publishers and offers more competitive prices to consumers. The only adversarial voice that would appear in this scenario is physical retail, and their grip on the market becomes weaker by the day.
In the end I really liked Titanfall,
9/10
Sorry if all this talk of business bored you, I promise this will be a very rare occurence, in the meantime enjoy a very funny video about Titanfall by the chaps over at Videogamer.
(Disclaimer, all pictures and/or videos used here are not my own, they are courtesy of, in top to bottom order: Shushans, Ask A Medic, Kotaku Australia and Videogamernot that any of those people will actually see this blog but yeah, please don't sue me.)
Hey all you sexy, sexy readers, just a quick public service announcement. My PC has been in the repair shop these past few weeks hence the lack of posts as my laptop is too slow to do any real work with, without it being an absolute pain in the arse. Normal service shall resume in the next couple of weeks or so, thank you for your patience and once again I apologise for the break in content. You will shortly be able to bask in my magnificence once more.
So today I have had zero pancakes. Call me treacherous scum, call me insane, call me what you like, all I can do is apologise and offer my broken soul to The Blood God. Yet if that doesn't satisfy you, here is a hastily written Pancake Day themed blog post, I present to you:
The Top 5 Videogame Characters Who Would Make Tasty Pancake Fillings!
1. Kirby
Now immediately when thinking of which characters I would include in this list, Kirby stood out. Including Kirby is somewhat of a cheat, but bear with me. Kirby is loveable, a great fighter and doesn't look very appetising, so why stuff Kirby into a pancake? Simple: one of Kirby's powers is to inhale and absorb his enemies thus stealing their powers. If Kirby inhales a knight for example, he gains a sword. Therefore it would make sense that should you stuff a lemon in Kirby's mouth, Kirby will become a citrus delight for your pancakes. The same goes for any flavour you like for your pancakes, just shove the ingredients into Kirby's maw, give him a shake over the pancakes and enjoy. Is Kirby being able to become essentially any flavour a cheat or a great idea? If you already have the ingredients to shove into Kirby's mouth, why not simply put them on the pancakes rather than forcing Kirby to regurgitate Nutella? The decision I leave to you dear readers.
2. Scrooge McDuck
A pancake classic is duck and hoisin sauce. This Pancake Day, why not head over to Disneyland, grab the first person in a Scrooge McDuck costume and proceed to fry them in a pan with some plums?* Scrooge is a very wealthy duck, so it stands to reason that he will have had a relaxed lifestyle so his meat should be tender and delicious. However should he prove to be too old a duck for your ageist tastebuds, there are also his younger grandnephews to chomp on; Huey, Dewey and Louie.
*Note, please for the love of God don't do this, people in Disney costumes taste awful, be sure to remove the costumes before cooking.
3. The Clickers
As Matt Lees of ex-Videogamer fame proved here, the Clickers from The Last of Us make an excellent mushroom substitute should you be able to, you know, avoid their deadly bites and hack them to pieces before any more infected show up on the scene. I've never had mushrooms in my pancakes, but I'm sure if you cooked them up with some sausages and maybe some bacon it would be a pretty good combination. Whilst yes, finding the ingredients for this recipe is marginally more dangerous than a trip to your local Tesco, you will have created a potentially awesome and original pancake at the end of it. Worth the effort? Hell yes.
4. Epona
Last year we had the horse-meat scandal here in the UK, and it turned out that a lot of our favourite burgers, sausages and so on contained a considerable amount of horse. I really like sausages with apple sauce in my pancakes, so it's more than likely that at least one of those sausages were made of premium-grade horse. The thing that troubles me is that I didn't notice a thing. I wouldn't be able to tell you the difference between a regular pork sausage and a horse one. As such, horse-meat may actually be pretty decent. Maybe, when roaming the wilds, instead of focusing on wild boar and cattle to hunt, we should be focusing on horse too. This is why I say that Epona, perhaps the most noteworthy of video-game horses, might make a decent sausage to slip into your pancake. If your back garden doesn't happen to lead out into the Hyrule Fields however, other videogame horses such as Agro, or Rapidash will suffice.
5. Tropius
Okay I'll admit I was running out of ideas here. It was late so I searched 'fruit pokemon' in Google and this is what came up. Apparently, Tropius is a Pokemon that grows bananas as a beard, so yeah, give it a shave or something, cook up the beard bananas with some sugar to get it all nice and caramelised and serve it up with some pancakes. Then go deal with your neighbours who will be complaining about the six-foot, flying Pokemon in your back garden. That, and a decomposing horse, an infected zombie-like creature, a family of talking ducks and a pink blob that: in between asking for a mercy killing, it spews maple syrup from its mouth. You awful human being.
(Disclaimer, all pictures and/or videos used here are not my own, they are courtesy of in top to bottom order: SuperLakitu, The Disney Wiki, VideoGamer TV, gameswallpaperhd, Zeldapedia, and IGN, not that any of those people will actually see this blog but yeah, please don't sue me)
So as you may know, Sonic Boom was announced the other week. A new Sonic game with a single trailer demonstrating what the game will look like, how some of the gameplay will function and giving hints to the story. It is too early to tell for sure how the game will turn out, there's not even been a release date announced yet, but like most of the gaming internet I'm going to speculate and draw conclusions on how this game will turn out based on a single trailer. This is why I am worried about Sonic Boom. I should preface that I am a Sonic fan, through my childhood I spent many an evening at my friend's house badgering them for goes on their Mega Drive and in this method I managed to complete all of Sonic 1, 2 and 3. I really don't know why they put up with me for so long. But throughout recent years Sonic has struggled to find his place. He has tried going all 3D, he has tried punching people in the face, he has tried sticking to his trademark of going really fast, yet whilst hinting at excellence in some of his games, none have really made an impact like the original games did.
So, reason number 1: Sonic is not an MMA fighter.
Now, I'm not going to go into the lore and history of Sonic the fucking Hedgehog, but I am fairly sure he hasn't been a professional fighter of any kind. Yet for some reason, Sonic, Tails and Knuckles are wearing athletic tape on their hands and legs. Knuckles, I can understand, he's a tough guy, he wants to prove his toughness by wearing some tape, fine, but unless the story is going to reveal that Sonic is the victim of a horrible house fire and the tape is simply covering up his burn wounds, the tape suggests that Sonic is going to be involved in some kind of fighting. This is a bad thing. Sonic has never got fighting right, he can just about get away with jumping on peoples heads, but as soon as he tries to throw a punch, he loses the plot. In Sonic Unleashed, the game let you transform into a Werehog, (yes, I know), a tougher, meaner version of Sonic, who could throw a punch and it was terrible. I wanted Sonic to punch me so I could just forget the time that I played as him. The fighting itself was fairly basic, but combined with the floaty sort of always trying to pick up speed way Sonic moves, it just never felt right. Sonic has always been at his best when running and or jumping.
Reason number 2: Sonic needs to develop an allergy to guns.
The Sonic universe has always had a weird relationship with guns. Traditionally used by Dr. Eggman, (or Robotnik depending on your preference for classic videogame villain's names), to shoot at you in the end of level stages, the protagonists never felt the need to use them. That is until Shadow The Hedgehog. Simply put, it was a disaster. I only played it once, so admittedly the rest of the game after the first hour may be the finest thing ever created, but sources I trust assure me it's not. A lack of any decent aiming or lock-on and again Sonic's floaty physics lead to a game that was irritating and awkward to control at the best of times, and un-playably difficult at the worst. This leads me to believe that Eggman actually isn't the villain of the Sonic universe, guns are, in that everything they touch in that universe either dies or turns to shit. That is why it worries me that in the trailer for Sonic Boom, we see Tails wielding some kind of plasma gun. Sonic games need to have momentum and speed, that is their trademark, and yet to be able to shoot effectively, you need to break that momentum by pausing to aim. I'm all for taking Sonic in a new direction, the Mario & Sonic Olympic titles prove that new directions can be effective, but unless Big Red Button Entertainment completely change Sonic's formula, I just can't see any form of shooting mechanics being able to work.
Reason number 3: Sonic was never actually that good.
Okay, so before you all come at me wielding machetes screaming "THIS IS SPARTA... wait, SONIC", hear me out. Sonic was a good game at the time it came out. It felt truly fast. Its speed was its selling point when competing with other platformers of the time such as Super Mario World, and later on Rayman and Super Mario 64. That sense of momentum felt great as it was something truly different, yet going back to play it now, well, it's just lost it's sheen. No longer is speed and momentum a novel idea in gaming. You forget about having to pause mid run to go back and pick up some lost rings, not having quite enough momentum to get over a loop and ending up having to stop, go back to pick up speed or use the spin dash. It was great at the time, but only an average game when analysed today. Some of you will say: "Alright dickhead, it's an old game, they do look worse when they get older" and fair point, a lot of games do, but the real greats, they stand the test of time, and whilst the graphics may not be as shiny as compared to today, or may have a different control style to what we are used to, they still are great fun to play. Go back and play Zelda: A Link to The Past, or Super Street Fighter II, I guarantee you they will be just as much fun as they were back then. Hell, you can play a copy of Doom and it will still be as fast paced and action packed as ever. The true classics stand the test of time and unfortunately, Sonic doesn't meet the cut. So, why does this matter with Sonic Boom? Now, if we are to assume that Big Red Button Entertainment are going to listen to various 'core fans' of the Sonic franchise, which would make sense if they want to make a game that appeals to both the core fanbase as well as those not so interested but will pick it up because it's a Sonic game, the majority of the core clamour for 'Old Sonic', Sonic like it was back in the day. So then you are basing a game on one which was mediocre at best and the fans will still complain because it won't feel as good as Old Sonic will with all the nostalgia it brings to the table. Then there's the alternative, BRBE may try to innovate and push the series in a new direction, which may not go down well at first, but when played, if pulled off could actually surprise some people. But then the question is, how far do you innovate? For all the shit I write about Old Sonic, he is still at his best when running and jumping. Move too far away from that and you'll have a game that simply isn't Sonic, and the fans will be pissed. Not enough, you risk falling into the trap of replicating a mediocre game, but then the middle ground is just full of half arsed gimmicks such as the Werehog and Shadow the Hedgehog with his guns, a middle ground where there is a clash between original Sonic's pace and momentum, and having to stop to do whatever gimmick is next. It is a difficult problem to solve and BRBE will have undoubtedly paid someone far more intelligent than myself to try and work around this, but so far, most previous attempts by previous companies have fell short of the mark, indicating that games developers are still struggling to find the solution. Like it or not, Sonic Boom is happening, and it feels like with the game being released alongside a new TV series, Sega alongside Big Red Button Entertainment are really pushing for this to be Sonic's finest hour. I did want to mention a couple of other things that I was considering whether or not to add to this piece. One of these things is the inclusion of dubstep in the trailer, and those gratingly annoying character voices. It just stinks like a rotting corpse, of a company trying to be hip and down with the kids. It seems like something Major Nelson would cook up on an off day. Does it worry me? Yes, it may mean that I don't enjoy the game as much as I otherwise would, but is it a deal breaker? No, I can just turn the volume down whilst playing, it's not going to effect the overall core gameplay and that's why I didn't make a full section or argument for it. It's aimed at a different audience and I just have to accept that.
Just shut up already you bastard!
Now, rendering this article completely irrelevant is the fact that the game isn't even out yet, with no release date on the horizon and only this one trailer to go on. The way developing works, any number of things can change yet. Sega could even choose to scrap the project entirely if they wanted to! Adding to that is the fact that Big Red Button Entertainment have been working on this thing for almost one and a half years already, they are clearly taking their time on this, and their team is made up of some very skilled dudes who used to work at Naughty Dog, so if anyone was going to know what the're doing, it's them. But still, I'm worried, and thought I'd construct a one and a half thousand word article telling anyone who cared all about it when I could have been doing much better things with my life. But still! I hope you enjoyed reading. If you liked it please let me know in the comments below or on my Twitter, (@ZakToms). Similarly, if you want to add to the debate, disagree with me, want to stalk me, have any suggestions or questions for the site, or just want to say hello, get in touch! I will embrace you all in open arms no matter what you think of Sonic. Keep on going fast you beautiful people. Zak
(Disclaimers, all pictures used are not my own, they are courtesy of in top to bottom order: Gamespot , Dan-Dare, Timothy on IGN forums, Sonic1 on Sega Forums, not that any of those people will actually see this blog but yeah, please don't sue me)
So first of all, apologies for the large hiatus in my writing. I've had a fair amount going on with exams and uni work, plus trying to maintain a decent family and home life and so my blog stuff kind of got shoved to one side a little bit, but now I'm back and hopefully will be getting more regular with blog posts.
Anyway, about a month ago I entered the 'Dulljam' games making jam, (whereby various people are given a certain amount of time to create a game based on a theme). We had to create a game based on the idea of dullness and the mundane. A sort of contrast and response to the adrenaline fueled power fantasy's many games aim for. At the time I was mid-way through essay season and needed something as a bit of a diversion so I jumped on Dulljam and wrote a game for it using Twine, (a text-adventure games engine), inbetween writing for my essays. You can find info about Dulljam, other entries and all sorts of amazing and far better gaming articles and commentary than mine at the excellent Midnight Resistance website.
I had a great time writing it and it proved a great distraction at the time. It got published on Midnight Resistance the other day so I thought I'd share with you my entry; 'Essay Writing Simulator: 2014 Edition'. As you can probably tell, it was heavily influenced by the mundane essays I was writing at the time. It sets you on an adventure to write an essay, the night before your deadline. Pressure is mounting, will you rush, will you panic or will you pull something spectacular out of the bag!? Despite being about a really dull time, it is a comedy game and will, (try), to get some laughs. I've had some great feedback so far. People have enjoyed it so I'm hoping you will too! If not I will hunt you down and murder you.
The game features multiple endings and branching pathways depending on how you play like an actual real life game, so replaying is encouraged. It took a lot of time and effort to get to grips with coding this so, (this is the last effort I promise), I would very much appreciate it if you give it a go. Also, I've had a look at the other games featured over at Midnight Resistance and they are all pretty excellent and you'll probably enjoy them more than mine, meaning you can make anything enjoyable if you vaguely simulate it in a videogame. I would certainly recommend checking the others out too.
So that just about wraps everything up for this blog entry. Stay tuned for more throughout the coming weeks and months. I promise you, like a guilty lover, that I will stop by more often and pay more attention to you. I will be a better blog. All those other blogs are just using you, no other blog loves you like this one does.
Also, If you have any comments or feedback for the game, either let me know in the comments down below, let me know on Facebook if we're friends, or reach me at @ZakToms on Twitter)
.png)
